remember to remember me
Currently i'm reading some exerts from a number of books by Frederick Buechner - published together in a book entiled: Listening to your life. these exerst are fairly short which serves me well... they are so rich that I could not digest more at a time.
this morning the few paragraphs gave a new (or rather old but now well verbalized) on the notion of others helping to make us know (or remember) ourselves. I cannot merely explain as well as he did so I'll just copy some bits in case we need to read it again some time:
"when you remember me, it means that you have carried something of who i am with you, that i have left some mark of who i am on who you are. it means that you can summon me back to your mind even though countless years and miles may stand between us. it means that if we meet again, you will know me. it means that even after i die, you can still see my face and hear my voice and speak to me in your heart.
for as long as you remember me, i am never entirely lost. when i'm feeling most ghost-like, it's your remembering me that helps remind me that i actually exist. when i'm feeling sad, it my consolation. when i'm feeling happy, it's part of why i feel that way.
if you forget me, one of the ways i remember who i am will be gone. if you forget me, part of who i am will be gone. "
this made me reflect on how i live my life in two ways:
1. what does it do to others if i try and 'forget' them? is it a case that they would be better off if i can forget them so that the negative memories of them will not contribute to who they are? and do they know that? maybe if i could get myself to forget them in that particular negative way, and one day we meet again, and i can be able to really leave that behind, then they will know that that particular negative thing is not a part of who they are anymore..?
2. can i possibly live my life so that others will not have a bad memory of me and in that way not building towards me knowing myself as a "bad" person in that particular regard?
well i don't know. but, what i do know is that at the moment, honesty in a relationship with anyone - even the people i greet on the street on in a grocery store trumps all. and if i cannot be good in honesty to people around me, rather not go out the door.
ps - again another extremely beautiful day here over false bay :-D
this morning the few paragraphs gave a new (or rather old but now well verbalized) on the notion of others helping to make us know (or remember) ourselves. I cannot merely explain as well as he did so I'll just copy some bits in case we need to read it again some time:
"when you remember me, it means that you have carried something of who i am with you, that i have left some mark of who i am on who you are. it means that you can summon me back to your mind even though countless years and miles may stand between us. it means that if we meet again, you will know me. it means that even after i die, you can still see my face and hear my voice and speak to me in your heart.
for as long as you remember me, i am never entirely lost. when i'm feeling most ghost-like, it's your remembering me that helps remind me that i actually exist. when i'm feeling sad, it my consolation. when i'm feeling happy, it's part of why i feel that way.
if you forget me, one of the ways i remember who i am will be gone. if you forget me, part of who i am will be gone. "
this made me reflect on how i live my life in two ways:
1. what does it do to others if i try and 'forget' them? is it a case that they would be better off if i can forget them so that the negative memories of them will not contribute to who they are? and do they know that? maybe if i could get myself to forget them in that particular negative way, and one day we meet again, and i can be able to really leave that behind, then they will know that that particular negative thing is not a part of who they are anymore..?
2. can i possibly live my life so that others will not have a bad memory of me and in that way not building towards me knowing myself as a "bad" person in that particular regard?
well i don't know. but, what i do know is that at the moment, honesty in a relationship with anyone - even the people i greet on the street on in a grocery store trumps all. and if i cannot be good in honesty to people around me, rather not go out the door.
ps - again another extremely beautiful day here over false bay :-D
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